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Peering over the hedges from inside the A or indeed the the D at the cars parked in the business park car parks 2 cars always stand out. They are often parked together, each totally confident within there particular type of existence.

The first is the pragmatic, the functional, the solid, the thoroughly Germanic Volkswagen Phaeton. It has a confident face set on those broad shoulders. One that speaks of great ability and an innate confidence. Of course you could buy the better looking, the more brutal Bentley Continental GT or the Phaetons true brother in brief; the Flying Spur, but really, if you are as confident as the underpinnings, the soul of this car, then you take the VW body-shell. You save 40k and gain a vehicle with the ability to be parked almost anywhere yet not attract any unwanted attention. It will almost certainly never go wrong and will look as good in ten years time as it does now with minimum of molly-coddling.

But for all of its great ability there is one glaring problem with the Phaeton. It feels nothing. It is passionless. It won't ever coax you into taking it out for a quickie. It will always be the automotive equivalent of an Intercity train; Big powerful, impressive yet there for a purpose not a whim.

The second of the duo is also big, powerful and limo-like. Only this one is beautiful, feline, passionate, moody and fragile. It is the Maserati Quattroporte. Where the wise money goes on a strong, pragmatic diesel heart in the Phaeton, you have only one choice in the QP. A Ferrari V8. Nothing signifies passion in a motor vehicle than to know a Ferrari heart is pumping those wheels along. Invariably it will live hard and fast before imploding roughly half way through its expected life span. It is also likely that sometimes (though not always) the electrical systems of the QP will simply refuse to work. If the technology existed for a diagnostic device similar to the Star Trek Tricorder to be used it would quickly find that the laws of physics have been bent on some unknown whim of the collection of metals and polymers that sit before you.

"Sir, it appears that there is a tear in the space-time continuum in the ECU".

Both of these cars are great, not because they fulfill an expectation of what a good luxury car is, but because they fulfill what it is to be who they are. They have been worked hard on being strong within the confines of there identities. This, really is what defines a brand. It is why an LS430, impressive though it is, is, for now at least, the automotive equivalent of an expensive fridge. It won't be until Lexus finds its particular face that a little soul will be injected.

So, the inevitable question is which of the two would I have? I'd probably (with the right size pockets) take the QP until it drove me so far up the wall that I'd chop it in for something practical for the week and something balls out for the weekend. What would those be?

Well, that's another story.

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